So, What’s Really Our Issue With Kirk Cousins?

Before I make you lie on the couch and deep dive into your feelings for Kirk, let me break some stats down for you (courtesy of ESPN).

  • 17 touchdown passes
  • 2718 passing yards
  • 56.5 QBR
  • 64.8% of passes complete
  • And finally, a passer rating of 102.7

Pretty good, right? You’d be happy if I gave you those stats when we signed Kirk, knowing what our defense is capable of? I mean, the defense almost carried a Case Keenum-led offense halfway through the NFC Championship Round in 2017. So, stats like these would surely lead us to glory, no?

But, what if the above stats don’t belong to Kirk Cousins. What if I told you they belong to the media darling, mother hating, Danica Patrick fucking, mustache (that isn’t nearly as manly as @b_heintzz) wearing, Aaron Rodgers? A sure-fire pro bowler in 2019, even though he has been mediocre. But his fans love him! They will easily make pie out of the dirt he walks on – mainly because people in Green Bay are stupid, but they will back their man! They will defend him to the masses and forgive his mistakes.

Kirk Cousins, Minnesota Vikings Quarterback Kirk Cousins, Our Kirk Cousins, $84 million Kirk Cousins, out-ranks Aaron Rodgers in all of the above stats in 2019. But, Vikings’ fans are still uncomfortable for some reason? Why? Let’s lie on the couch and talk it out…


The easiest excuse is “because we are Minnesota” (well, you are MN… I live in England and like Cricket). We don’t like to accept a good thing, because we have been hurt in the past. It troubles us because every time we get our hopes us, we get trampled on. On other websites, the article would have ended here. But at, our ethos is simple; We are sick of the expectation to lose. Winners live here, work here, and raise winning businesses and families here… our teams can win here too.

So, let’s dig a little deeper…

Do we dislike Kirk because of his personality? Is he, well, too much of a good boy? He always says the right things, never shouts at anyone, thanks the Lord, doesn’t get fired up. Is that too boring for us to fall in love with? Do we prefer a bad boy? Someone who will slap the ass of the waitress who is walking past, whilst French kissing you during dinner at a medium-priced steak house?

There is a whole fanbase in Washington State who is in love with Russell Wilson. Yes, Monotone, boring (like a dry wall), too level-headed, Russell Wilson. Having a boring personality can still be an endearing quality to fan bases…. and Ciara apparently? So, Kirk’s personality isn’t getting in the way of us committing to him.

Perhaps, we hate Kirk because he is earning, what’s the amount? I can never remember, until a Cheesehead uses it as a Twitter insult and then follows with “hOw MaNy RiNgS dO yOu HaVe?”. Do we hate Kirk because he is earning so much money? Does that make a person repulsive? For the record, Matt Ryan ($100m), Jared Goff ($110m), Carson Wentz ($110m) all earn more guaranteed money than Kirk. And their fan bases are certain they have themselves a franchise QB. Although Rams, you might want to revaluate that one. So, if money doesn’t stop love… what does?

It has to be Kirk’s ability to fuck up in crucial situations. He never seems to step up in big games and is always the reason the Vikings lose. Take for example the Green Bay game earlier this year and the… um… the… you know… the Green Bay game.

Kirk has thrown THREE interceptions ALL SEASON, one off the hands of Stefon Diggs. In comparison, HOF QB Tom Brady has thrown 5 already! Almost as many as his super bowl rings… Kirk has also led his team to more game winning drives than Tom Brady has this year, and against superior opponents. Beating the Cowboys in their house was exceptional! So, bad play doesn’t automatically cost you love.

We can park Kirk’s personality, money and mistakes. So why isn’t Kirk Cousins a franchise QB that the whole fan base can support?


And there we have it. After a lot of soul searching, the reason we cannot hand over the keys to our heart, is because Kirk has not won anything (yet). Zero super bowls, zero championships, zero playoff games, heck the only time he finished top of the division was after a poor 9-7 season, where the NFC East was dog shit. Kirk is not a proven winner. Until he wins, all the money, big plays, nice guy won’t make us love him…

What does Kirk need to win for us to love him? NFC North? Wild Card? Divisional Round? NFC? Super Bowl?

Sanka | Minnesota Sports Fan

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