Snow storms are reminiscent of a hungover day at work. First and foremost, both are huge character builders. Second of all, once you are done with the bullshit, there’s a euphoria associated with surviving the entire mess.

With mother nature punching us in the kisser on Saturday, that excitement is what Minnesotans (including myself) were experiencing on Sunday. Once that feeling was parlayed with this announcement, regarding the Minnesota Twins, I was about to come out of my skin:

Source: #MNTwins, Logan Morrison have a deal, pending physical. $6.5 million guaranteed. Vesting option with escalators and performance bonuses. Chance to be 2-years, $16.5 million.

— Robert Murray (@RobertMurrayFRS) February 25, 2018

Let’s go! While Twins’ Nation plays checkers over possible signings of Yu Darvish, Mike Napoli, and others, Falvey and Levine are on some Bobby Fischer chess-champion shit.

What is Minnesota getting with Logan Morrison?

The 30 year-old, whose nickname is LoMo, will start the season as Minnesota’s primary DH. However, on days where Paul Molitor decides to DH or rest Joe Mauer, he can pencil Morrison in at 1B.

Possible Twins lineup:
2B Brian Dozier
1B Joe Mauer
3B Miguel Sano
DH Logan Morrison
LF Eddie Rosario
RF Max Kepler
CF Byron Buxton
SS Jorge Polanco
C Jason Castro

A very potent group.

— Buster Olney (@Buster_ESPN) February 25, 2018

As for his bat, the 6’3″ 245 pound, left-handed slugger finished the 2017 season with a .246 batting average (.353 OBP), while hitting 38 home runs and driving in 85 runs. For comparison purposes, both Brian Dozier’s 34 bombs and 93 RBIs lead last year’s Twins squad.

Male readers: If your significant other seems oddly interested in LoMo, stay woke. Last time I checked, chicks dig the long ball.

It should be noted that Morrison’s 2017 HR and RBI total were both career highs.

Logan Morrison MLB Statistics:

Obviously, if he can get anywhere near last season’s numbers, the $6.5 million is straight out of the beloved bargain bin. 

Despite the Miguel Sano injury, your Twins finished the post-All-Star stretch with the second most run in the majors, in 2017. The way I saw it; with all due respect to Robbie Grossman, Kenny Vargas, and others, the DH slot was painful to watch, at times. In his 1,380 big league at bats, Grossman has hit 31 home runs. Vargas’ size is Big Papi-esque, but that’s about all he and David Ortiz have in common.

That’s why I liked the Mike Napoli (in GIF w/Ortiz) rumors from earlier this offseason. That’s why I love this Logan Morrison signing.

Now what? On to the next one?

Lance Lynn and Alex Cobb are both our there for the taking. Per our article from Saturday, I see those two as a horse a piece. Let’s grab one of them to join us for this 162 game dance. If the master recruiter that is P.J. Fleck the recently acquired Jake Odorizzi has anything to say about it, Cobb will be joining the rotation.

Jake Odorizzi is trying to recruit Logan Morrison AND Alex Cobb to the #mntwins. Source with direct knowledge said today #mntwins are showing interest in Morrison.

“Those guys would help any team,” Odorizzi said. https://t.co/57H6kURuRl

— Mike Berardino (@MikeBerardino) February 25, 2018

Johnny Minnesota @TheJohnnyMN
Minnesota Sports Fan MinnesotaSportsFan.com

At least for this upcoming season, Eduardo Escobar will be playing baseball in Minnesota. Per Thursday’s reports, he and the Twins agreed to a one year, $4.85 million deal.

The signing came a day prior to the MLB’s arbitration deadline. Missing Friday’s cut off means that any remaining arbitration-eligible players and their team need to exchange proposed salaries for the 2018 season. The purpose of swapping desired contracts is to prepare for a potential hearing on what a player should be paid.

The January 12th time-limit is now irrelevant to Escobar. One of the Twins’ clubhouse favorites and his employer hashed things out without a third wheel. With the 29 year-old now set to make almost $5 million this year, the only thing he should be exchanging are chips at the Bellagio.

In what I consider no coincidence, they reached an agreement amid the MLB’s sexual assault investigation of Miguel Sano. With his upcoming availability in great flux, motivation to retain Escobar naturally increased.

This upcoming season will mark the switch hitter’s 8th in the majors. Of his 619 career MLB games, our infield’s Renaissance man has played 574 of them with Minnesota. In 2017, Escobar hit .254, with a career high .758 OPS. Over last year’s 499 at-bats, he also compiled a career high in HRs (21) and RBIs (73)

With Eduardo Escobar secured for what Twins’ Nation hopes is another exciting season, the following five players still remain arbitration-eligible: Robbie Grossman (OF), Ehire Adrianza (IF) and pitchers Kyle Gibson, Ryan Pressly, and Trevor May.

Relax fanboys and fangirls of Ryan Pressly. I like your passion, but damn. If Pressly and MN don’t agree to a deal by Friday’s deadline, they’ll still probably end up agreeing to one and avoid any hearings. Until actually sitting in front of arbitrators, the two involved parties can continue negotiations.

Cowboys? What the f*ck?

That’s a real hard deadline you have their, MLB. What a joke. I always wondered where my WI Public University professors got their contradictory approach to cutoff dates from.

Johnny Minnesota @TheJohnnyMN
Minnesota Sports Fan MinnesotaSportsFan.com